Tuesday, May 20, 2008

the davids duke it out

Can David Archuletta please grow some...what are they called?...Oh wait, I remember now. BALLS. Seriously, get a pair David. Oh, his stumbling around for words, his mumbling speech patterns, his near-crying endeavors just made me want to barf all over. I so don't want him to win, but let's be honest with ourselves 'in this moment'...he will. Nevertheless, I will stay strong & courageous for my man Cookie.
BTW, when did it become cool to name the winner after each round? That's the opposite of cool, Simon. You better fix this. I don't know how & I don't know when, but you & your sneaking-out chest hair had better repair the mess you just created.
Cookie does a U2 song to open up the show, & I loved it. Yes there could have been a bigger peak to the song, but all in all, I thought it kicked. Archuletta did something stupid by Elton John. Another one of his repeat ballads.
Then, the ever-embarrassingly-sickening-ridiculous songwriting choices! Can anyone win this round? They're singing songs the public has never heard, not to mention at a time when the public doesn't want to hear a new song. The odds aren't exactly in their favor. I thought Cook did way better than Archuletta, but I think I stand alone on this one. Archuletta did something up my ass about believing in a moment. Argh, Kelly Clarkson did something about a moment & didn't Miss Jordin do a moment song last season too? Give it up people. Write new stuff. Quit recycling.
Ok third round. The Davids do whatever they want. Cook chooses a Collective Soul song which he does amazing with. He starts crying, which makes me so sad because I then start thinking about his brother & the sadness that it is. Randy gives him a two-thumbs up, Paula gives him a standing ovation & says "you're standing in your truth" (really, Paula...really?), & Simon is an ass. He says he chose the utterly wrong song for the night. Cook explains his dissatisfaction & confusion about choosing to do a song he's already done in the competition. I totally agree. Do I want to hear a song he's already done before? A big fat no way. But what does Archuletta decide to do? Why, just that, ladies & gentlemen! He does "Imagine", which I'm sure his stage-dad told him to do from backstage...but wait, didn't his dad get kicked out from being backstage because he was messing with the production & trying to run the show, not to mention call the shots on everything his son did? OK that's the first clue America. This is not American Idol material. Randy obviously is in love with Archuletta tonight which makes little Davie cry & babble like my baby Levi. Paula says he was stunning, & Simon thought he was a knock-out.
Well, Archuletta will take the cake, but my man Cook will sell more records. All in due time...all in due time.


Michael Kelley said...

Dude - I love when you write about this show, and I don't even like American Idol.

So who is David Cook again?

Heather said...

You are so right on everything you wrote. I love David Cook and he is so much better. David A. will probably win because AI seems to have turned into a popularity contest this year.

David Cook will sell more records and be more professional.

It probably is good that I have to work late tonight and can't watch it. I might cry if David C. does not win.